Pam Ann Crash Lands in Provincetown
by Steve Desroches
Pam Ann is the ultimate jet setter. She’s been to most everywhere and done most everything. The alter ego of Australian comedian Caroline Reid, Pam Ann keeps one foot in the Golden Age of Aviation and the other in the miseries of modern air travel as she straddles a flaming 747 delivering a campy, hilarious show that has made her a global superstar. From Alitalia to Zambian Airways, Reid is recognized every time she flies, as she’s become the patron saint of flight attendants who have officially had it. But after touring the globe for 25 years, the Melbourne-born comedy sensation is ready to join the ground crew for a while, starting with a month-long run at the Crown and Anchor.
Don’t get it wrong. Pam Ann is as fun and fabulous as ever, but after opening for Cher and entertaining Elton John and friends at a private party on a transatlantic charter flight, she’s looking for the party to come to her. After living in London and New York, she’s relocated to Miami. Relaxing under the palm trees of southern Florida, thoughts of Provincetown came to mind. Of all the places she’s traveled, Provincetown is truly one of her favorites. She revels in the Florida sunshine and old gay men in caftans shuffling along the Miami Beach Boardwalk, but she’s looking forward to a bit of a break from all of that.
“I moved where flight attendants go to die,” says Reid. “I’m with all the retirees. No more blow. No more staying up till six in the morning. I’m just here with all the gays with too much money and nothing to do. It’s my life now. I love it. But, darling, I can’t wait for Provincetown.”
Long a staple of Bear Week, Pam Ann is spreading her wings and staying almost the entire month of July. Truth be told she hates flying. Really. It scares her. And perhaps no voyage frightens her more than taking Cape Air from Boston to Provincetown, as she envisions the pilot getting sucked out the window of the plane and having to land it herself just like Karen Black in the classic air disaster flick Airport 1975. Reid takes a deep breath at the thought, and reassures herself by repeating, “it’s just a movie.” You get the distinct impression that if Pam Ann was indeed on a plane going down, she’d have everyone laughing in their oxygen masks. Never mind the Miracle on the Hudson. A night with Pam Ann is more like being an extra in Airplane!
Pam Ann’s in-flight hijinks have landed her very real fame in the most remote parts of the world. Wherever planes fly, Pam Ann is usually known by the aviation community there. And the local gay community. Her gay following began when she performed in gay clubs in Melbourne and has been the biggest portion of her fan base globally ever since. Her sense of camp and savage wit make sure of that. Despite her comedic critiques of how awful flying is, airlines reach out to Pam Ann to promote them. She’s done major advertising campaigns for British Airways, Qantas, JetBlue, and Scandinavian Airlines….and then gone on to make fun of said airlines at her shows.
The universality of the absurdities of air travel gave Reid an opportunity not open to many comedians. She’s been a pioneer in opening up the comedy, and in turn the drag queen circuit, taking her show to previously uncharted territory, made easier with the expansion of English as a common world language. Sure, she’s played London, New York, and Sydney, but she’s also packed houses in Bratislava, Reykjavik, and Oslo.
Having her jokes land in all areas of the English-speaking world is one thing, but how do you make people laugh, by effectively communicating the camp and sarcasm when the audience might not understand everything you’re saying in the first place? “Darling, when you go to a place like Warsaw, they’re just happy you’re there,” says Reid. “They haven’t laughed in years. No one goes there. They think I’m hilarious just for showing up.”
Plugging in the respective national airline for wherever Pam Ann is performing is the only thing that is anything close to formulaic about her show. It’s merely an icebreaker as it’s easy to get people in Amsterdam to laugh about KLM or in Berlin about Lufthansa. But from there on out, much of her shows are improv, a comedic art form of which she is a master. Buckle Up Bitches, the show she is bringing to Provincetown, is sure to follow an unexpected course. The flight might be full of turbulence, but there will be plenty of booze on the Crown and Anchor Airlines, and Pam Ann always lands in the most hilarious way.
One thing Reid is done doing is defending air travel. She used to point out various facts that the general public might not be aware of to make certain circumstances easier to understand. But now, nope, flying just sucks. With people putting their stank bare feet on your arm rest, showing up for flights in their pajamas, and that lady who tried to bring a “comfort peacock” on a plane, air travel has gone from the glamorous days of Pan Am to the Greyhound Bus in the sky. Of all the indignities of taking to the skies now, Reid can assure there will be no children on this flight.
“I hate children,” says Reid. “I hate screaming children. If I could hit children, I would. There should be a time when you can do that, like in the Purge film. But the worst are stupid people. They make flying the worst. I know all about stupid people; I live in Florida. Flying in and out of Fort Lauderdale is the worst. I hate stupid people. And it’s getting worse, too! I’d take a whole plane of barking comfort animals if there weren’t any children or stupid people on it!”
Pam Ann presents Buckle Up Bitches! at the Crown and Anchor, 247 Commercial St., Provincetown, Wednesdays through Sundays at 8:45 p.m. until July 27. Tickets ($30/$40) are available at the box office and online at onlyatthecrown.com. For more information call 508.487.1430.
